A Poem from the Heart

He said, "Lay down and die."
So I bit my lip, let out a cry.
"Why oh why? Why must I die?"
Tears dripping down my face not dry.

So I laid down upon that place.
Betting all I have upon grace,
And then I waited and waited more
And a burden then struck me to the core.

I laid down upon that rock
And patiently checked the clock.
I wanted desperately to arise,
Yet laid there awaiting the prize.

And still I lay and wait for death.
Wondering when it will be my last breath.
You said You wanted for me to die,
Yet why won't You come and let me die?

I am not distressed at what You say.
Will Your promises come true today?
Why must I wait and wait and wait
For a harvest I know that is not late?

Why must my heart continue to break?
How much more of this can I take?
When will you come and kill me so?
When will this burden be let go?

I know it is soon and I know I can wait,
But please be timely and don't be late.
My heart has had its fill of this pain,
So please be gentle so I don't go insane.

I know You speak and I have heard
Many wonderful things; Your Word.
But I now am doubting if its true.
I am just being honest with You.

I am on that rock in that place
Still searching for a glimpse of Your face.
Still waiting upon your Word;
The Word which you promised and I heard.

I have died. I have died. I have died,
Yet I live and I live and I have cried
Too many tears and fasted too many meals,
And all I want is to just be healed.

Not just that, but there is a lot more.
And you know my heart; my face upon floor
Can You just do what You promised?
Can You just please do what You promised?

I am hurting laying and waiting.
It is painful to just wait waiting.
But I will still look to You
For there is nothing I can do.

I can only lay here on this rock.
Knowing one day I will see the clock
And You will say, "Arise now and live."
And I will stand with a heart healed to live.

So I will wait and wait and wait
For as long as this will take.
My heart is Yours; my life is Yours
My soul is Yours; my all is Yours.

I will cry more tears
Releasing my fears.
I will fast more meals
And chase You for reals.

I am Yours so have Your way.
There is nothing You cannot say.
I am ready now oh so ready now.
Do what You will; do what You will.